Not anymore. Reggie and Billy were having a love affair–a clandestine romance whose disclosure, in a moment of panic and confusion, destroyed their military careers. Their story, told pseudonymously at their request, is not a tragedy–both young men have simply returned to civilian life. But it is emblematic of the difficulties faced by gay men and women who serve in the military under the Pentagon’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.
“Don’t ask, don’t tell” is now under attack by gay political activists and may yet be scrapped. The Pentagon says the policy is working and that tolerance toward gays is generally the rule in all four service branches. But after the beating death of a gay soldier at Fort Campbell, Ky., Defense Secretary William Cohen ordered sensitivity training and renewed emphasis on “don’t ask, don’t tell.” Last week a gay-advocacy group, the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, said reported anti-gay incidents more than doubled and violations of the “don’t ask” policy rose 30 percent in 1999. The group said discharges under the policy were 73 percent higher than they had been in 1993.
Pentagon officials say upwards of 80 percent of those discharges were voluntary–that by identifying themselves as gay to their commanders, many gay and lesbian soldiers in effect opt out of the military. That wasn’t true of Reggie and Billy. They were paratroopers and proud of it–members of an elite unit, the 508th Airborne, that was among the first to be deployed in Bosnia and a mainstay of the effort to rescue U.S. citizens during Liberia’s civil war. They met during basic training at Fort Benning, Ga., though they didn’t become lovers until later. Reggie signed up for Airborne training, and he and Billy went their separate ways.
They met again in Vicenza in 1995, when Billy joined the 508th. Reggie was already there, and he was establishing himself as a top-rated soldier. Their battalion commander, Lt. Col. Arnold Bray, was a legendary leader who stood 6 feet 6 and was a dead ringer for Michael Jordan. The battalion trained relentlessly and partied just as hard: fun meant drinking beer all night and sleeping with as many Italian girls as possible. The homophobia was constant. “Homosexuality was a dangerous topic,” says Nathan Tymeson, who served in the 508th at that time. (Tymeson is straight.) “There are ways people can make you pay for it, out in the field.”
Reggie and Billy did what they had to do–they lived a double life. Still, Reggie says, they knew that others in the unit were calling them fags behind their backs and that the anti-gay climate at Vicenza was potentially dangerous. In 1997, the 508th was swept by rumors about gays in the ranks, and two soldiers were abruptly sent home. There was an epidemic of homophobic grumbling, including some threats. Then Billy was abruptly reassigned to the 82d Airborne at Fort Bragg, N.C. Billy was already having emotional problems, which an Army doctor diagnosed as a delayed stress reaction to his experiences in Bosnia and Liberia. Now he was afraid for his own safety, and both he and Reggie worried that their love affair was no longer secret. Then they panicked and went AWOL, hiding out in an abandoned house in the Italian countryside. “It was spontaneous, a panic,” Reggie says. “I was friends with a lot of people on post, [but] they would have beat me pretty severely, because to them I had betrayed them.”
Two weeks later, realizing they had no other workable option, they came back to the post and turned themselves in. Colonel Bray sent for Reggie. “I let you down,” Reggie said. Bray asked him why he had gone AWOL. Reggie said he did it because he thought he was going to be beaten up by guys in the outfit. Bray didn’t understand why. Despite Reggie’s utter certainty that everyone in the unit knew their secret, Bray had never suspected Reggie and Billy were gay. Reggie tried to explain. “I’ve touched guys and I’ve been touched by guys,” he said. Bray was stunned. “Man, you’re a promising human being and a promising soldier. Only half of that is going to remain. You’re a great guy, but the rules say you have to go,” Bray said. Reggie’s career would have survived going AWOL, but saying he was gay meant the end.
They were shipped home within weeks. Reggie got an honorable discharge because of Bray, and he is now in college. Billy, who was technically a member of the 82d Airborne at the time his homosexuality was disclosed in Italy, got an other-than-honorable discharge because the 82d punished him for desertion. Though they are no longer together, Billy and Reggie share a deep anger at the military’s inflexibility toward gays. “Throw homosexuality into the equation, and all of my talent and experience becomes tainted as far as Uncle Sam is concerned,” Reggie says. That talent and experience are heading for a civilian career now.
Photo: The Reluctant Gay-Rights Activist: Steve May didn’t intend to become a soldier in the gay-rights movement. As a conservative Republican who counts John McCain as a hero, he never made an issud of his sexuality, even when he was outed during an election campaign. But last year the first-term representative took the Arizona House floor after a legislator introduced an anti-gay bill by saying gays live “at the lower end of the behavioral spectrum.” As chance sould have it, May - honorably discharged from the Army in 1995 and still in the Reserves - was called to active reserve duty three days later. Because of his Statehouse statements, the Army is now investigating him under the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. Suddenly, May has been dragged into the fray. “My job is not to fight the policy,” says May, who has been universally praised by his commanding officers. “But I think my story is so absurd that the policy is fighting itself. I want the American public to know what’s happening with their tax dollars.”
